Tara Sophia Mohr | Playing Big

Tara Sophia Mohr, Playing Big. Find Your VOICE, Your MISSION, and Your MESSAGE.

Taking Inventory

While I’m on maternity leave, I’m sharing some favorite posts from the past few years. This is one of them – enjoy!   ~ Tara

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Taking Inventory

You can listen to this post in audio, too. Click the player to download an mp3 file, or you can read below …
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I’ve noticed a pattern in my life.

It’s a pattern that occurs around the situations that don’t work out so well.

The things I commit to that end up being a waste of time. The relationships that are in stilted spots. The times I act in ways I am not proud of.

Lately I’ve noticed that most of those situations share a similar backstory. Before the problematic event or the unwanted outcome, I felt subtle feelings of discomfort.

You know when you see something out of the corner of your eye, in your peripheral vision? You see it, but just barely.

The feelings of discomfort that I’m talking about are just like that.

It’s not that they are so mild but more that I just don’t give my attention to them. When they are present, I am sort of aware of them, but just barely. I’m moving fast in other directions, swimming here and there at the surface of the water, as those subtler feelings make the currents below.

That is why – if I don’t want my life to be full of situations not working out so well – I need a space to take inner inventory, to do a scan of what’s present in me. By that I mean both a space in time – time set aside, and an emotional space – either a space of openness to myself, or the listening ears of a friend or coach or therapist. I also mean a physical space – a walk in solitude, or the blank page of a journal, or that friend’s cozy couch.  All three – a space in time, an emotional space, and a physical space – are needed.

In that space, I can become conscious of what’s happening – not just the big events occurring in my life but the things brewing, the things otherwise only in peripheral vision. This is when I can ask the ongoing questions that need asking like, “How am I feeling about what’s happening on my work team?” Or, “What’s up with feelings about my home these days?” Or, “What’s present in my relationship with my partner right now?”

Then I can investigate. What is that low-level stress I am feeling? Or, huh, what’s up with the late night emotional eating of the past few weeks? Or, hmmm, I am really avoiding calling so-and-so back – what’s going on there?

During my regular days there’s lots that grabs center stage: the things on the calendar, the to do list for the week, the conversations of that day. The pureeing, and singing while diapering, and rescuing the lasagna before it’s entirely eaten by the dog.

The things that aren’t quite right but still unfolding their not-quite-rightness? In my regular life, those things simply won’t win the competition for focus.

I need to give them time and space. I need time and space to tune into the subtle stirrings. I discover lots then, things like: “This dynamic isn’t feeling quite right, and I realize I’m bringing a real sense of scarcity to this situation – what’s that about?” Or, “I said x in this situation, but you know? I left out y, and saying y was important.” Or, “I agreed to this, but the truth that is here right now is that I really want to say no.” Or, “I’m losing motivation around this writing project. Hmm. Interesting.”

If we don’t notice what’s present, we can’t take action based on the wisdom of what our inner compass is telling us. We can’t steer well.

So today I invite you to do a check-in with yourself. Notice the subtle stirrings you are feeling in the major areas of your life. As if you are holding up a soft light, explore what’s there, with compassion for yourself.

Love,

Tara



baby is almost here

It’s a magical time, this threshold of welcoming a new human into the world.

I keep trying to grasp it … in a few weeks, a baby will be here. I keep silently working it through, trying to help my mind understand it: this young life that is now stretching and moving inside of me will soon be outside of me, a person – a person!!! – that I will get to look at and meet and hold.

It’s too strange and big of a transition for the mind to grasp, really.

And it’s wonderfully mysterious and baffling and exciting.

Like most second time moms, I possess mostly amnesia about what it was like to care for a newborn. But I can recall attempting to get just a few simple things done each day (such as shower, eat something substantial/warm – not just another granola bar – send that one email …) and often failing to get that simple list done, again and again.

Based on that, I’m going to tentatively guess I won’t be blogging prolifically in the next few months. 😉

But, I do have lots of wonderful things lined up for you for the coming months …

 

Wednesday Posts

Each Wednesday over the next few months, you’ll receive a blog post from me – a favorite post from the archives. Many of these posts now also include new audio with some updated thoughts and commentary.
 

2017 Programs

If you are thinking of joining us for a course or training program in the coming year, be sure to check out our recent email about what’s coming up in 2017 HERE, so you can plan ahead and sign up to get early information on programs you are interested in.
 

On Social

If we aren’t yet connected on social media, please find me on Facebook HERE, or Instagram HERE, so we can stay in touch there as well.
 

Thank You

Yes, I will do my best to let you all know when baby is safely arrived – thank you for asking about that and for caring!

And yes, I welcome all prayers and good vibes for labor and this little one’s arrival and early weeks. I’ll take all the positive energies I can get for that!

Last but not least, I want to say thank you for all your comments and reading and togethership with me and others here.

Love,

Tara

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Our 2017 Programs

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Greetings!

I want to share with you what’s coming up for our Playing Big training programs in 2017.

The next session of our Playing Big Intensive course will be taking place May – July. This is my core program for women who want to experience more impact and fulfillment in their work and in their lives — and less self-doubt, fear, and holding back! This is an online program so you can participate from anywhere you have an internet connection. Over the past five years, thousands of women around the world have participated and as a result, they are experiencing amazing changes in their lives.

Starting in October 2017, we’ll have the next session of my Playing Big Facilitators Training. This course is for women who want to use the Playing Big model in their own lives and careers AND who also want to bring it into their work mentoring, managing or coaching. You’ll not only go on a personal transformative journey but you’ll also learn a host of tools and practices you can bring to your work supporting others.

The Facilitators Training is for:
   • Coaches and therapists looking to realize their own playing big dreams, and to better empower women in their work
   • Managers seeking advances in their careers who also want to learn powerful tools for managing, supporting, and mentoring
   • Teachers, professors, advisors and administrators who are navigating working in educational settings, helping women students and colleagues achieve their full potential
   • Others whose work involves supporting women or girls, or who would like to take their work in this direction.

2017-programs

If you have interest in learning more about either program (or both — many women have taken both courses and they work great in combination with each other!), click HERE to get on our Advanced Notice list so you’ll receive program details and be the first to know when registration opens.

When you sign up, you’ll also be able to download our 2017 Playing Big Program Guide, with details about our programs. This is a handy document you can share with your organization if you are seeking funding from them. Many of our participants have had great success with having their employers sponsor their participation in our programs. (We know this can be a lengthy process at some companies and institutions, so we wanted to get these supporting materials to you well in advance.)

We hope you’ll join us for a fabulous experience of community, growth and learning in 2017!

Love,

Tara

Last Day to Get Your Signed Holiday Books!

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Good morning!

Are you still looking for gifts for some of your incredible women friends, family members and colleagues?

We’ve got you covered!

Today is the last day to let us know if you’d like to receive our beautiful, signed bookplates for your Playing Big book gifts this year.

For a reminder of how this works, read below, or click the player to download an mp3 file.

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My team and I wanted to make it extra special for you to share Playing Big: Practical Wisdom for Women Who Want to Speak Up, Create and Lead this holiday season.

So, when you order 3 or more copies today, I’ll sign bookplates for your gift recipients! We’ll mail them off to you, and you can personalize them with a note from you.

Your dear ones will receive a *signed* copy of the book and your message in our lovely custom bookplates – just like the one below.

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We’re so excited about this!

Here’s what to do to participate:

Step 1: Purchase 3 or more Playing Big copies from wherever you like to buy books, such as Amazon.com, Barnes and Noble, or Indiebound.

Step 2. Fill out this form to let us know you’re in!

Step 3. Get your bookplates from us in the mail.

Step 4: Give the dear women in your life a personalized, signed Playing Big book this holiday season!

We are closing this offer TODAY Monday, December 5th, at midnight to ensure all the bookplates get out in time for the holiday, so be sure to place your order right away if you want to join us!

Warmly,

Tara

 

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a new favorite question I’m asking myself

You can listen to this post in audio, too. Click the player to download an mp3 file, or you can read below …
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Today I  want to share a new question I came across recently. I’ve been asking myself this question at the end of my day fairly regularly, and I always find the answers that it brings up to be surprising and INCREDIBLY helpful.

It’s this:

What is the character trait of mine
that most got in the way of my happiness today?

The first time I asked myself this question, I’d had a rough day. All day long, my inner critic had been chattering in my head about my body’s changes during this pregnancy, and I was feeling overwhelmed by everything on my plate – the list of parenting, work, and pre-new-baby things I wanted to get done.

So, if you had asked me casually about what was bothering me that day, I would have said, 1) stuff around my body and 2) being overwhelmed.

But then I asked myself that question:

What is the character trait of mine
that most got in the way of my happiness today?

And as I reflected, and journaled about it a bit, the answer was clear: it was a lack of self-acceptance, a lack of being okay with where I am right now – in body and in mind and spirit – that had most gotten in the way of my happiness all day.

It was not the changes in my body, or the length of my to-do list. It was the lack of self-acceptance, of reality-acceptance.

And while I had no ability to change how my body has done this pregnancy, and no ability to add more hours in the day (or more stamina to myself) to get through more of that to-do list, this – the lack of acceptance – was an issue I could do something about.

I could see and feel how this lack of acceptance was hurting me, so I couldn’t just do it unconsciously anymore.

I could practice being more compassionate (and more in touch with reality) about where I really was.

I also asked power greater than myself – life, love, light – to grace me with more self-acceptance in the days to come.

All of that created a powerful shift, and more acceptance did come, and more peace and day-to-day happiness with it.

This isn’t about beating ourselves up, or blaming ourselves for everything. It’s about digging beneath the surface to see what in our own approach, belief system or patterns, is contributing to our unhappiness or stuckness. From there we can make change, change that allows us to address both the internal and external aspects of any problem.

So this is the question I offer you, to ask yourself at the close of your day today: What is the character trait of mine that most got in the way of my happiness today?

If you aren’t resonating with the word “happiness,” of course, you can substitute something like “peace” or even “gratitude” or “calm” – whatever you are aiming for in your day.

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And, the holidays are coming up!

My team and I are so excited to have created something to make it even more special to give the Playing Big book to the dear women in your life this holiday season.

Click HERE to learn about getting your custom, signed bookplates to include with holiday gifts. This is a beautiful way to remind the women in your life of the brilliance you see in them!

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